Generic Radio Workshop Script Library (GO BACK) (Downloadable Text File)

Series: Academy Award Theater
Show: The Great McGinty
Date: Apr 20 1946

MUSIC:

THEME ... IN AND UNDER

ANNOUNCER:

The House of Squibb, manufacturing chemists of the medical profession since 1858, bring you "Academy Award!"

The pictures, the players, the techniques and skills which have won, or been nominated for, the coveted award granted each year by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences to each in his field for outstanding achievement!

MUSIC:

THEME ... UP AND OUT

ANNOUNCER:

The House of Squibb, makers of the great family of Squibb medicinal products, brings you the distinguished Paramount star Brian Donlevy in "The Great McGinty," the original screenplay for which Preston Sturges won his 1940 Academy Award!

MUSIC:

FOR AN INTRODUCTION ... THEN OUT

SOUND:

NOISY CROWD AT SALOON ... IN BG

NARRATOR:

This is the story of a guy called McGinty who's tendin' bar in a joint south of the border. This is a story of McGinty, his friends, and their brief day o' glory.

MUSIC:

SALOON MUSIC, IN BG

NARRATOR:

Well, here we are. And, if your eyes can see through the cigarette smoke, I'll point out our interestin' characters. Oh yeah, those, er, tough deadpan-lookin' mugs at the table playin' poker ...

BOSS:

Hello, friend ... get it up!

NARRATOR:

That's the boss -- used to be a big shot political boss up north.

LOUIE:

I'm in, boss.

NARRATOR:

That's Louie. He carries a rod under his arm and nuthin' under his cap!

POLITICIAN:

I'm in, too, boss.

NARRATOR:

That's the politician.

SOUND:

FOOTSTEPS AWAY FROM TABLE

NARRATOR:

And over here, the pale faced young man starin' into his drink -- his name is Thompson. He's new down here and very sad.

THOMPSON:

(IN DESPAIR) Where's the door to the patio?

McGINTY:

Right behind that potted palm.

NARRATOR:

And behind the bar ...

McGINTY:

Watch this bar for me, Pedro. I got a hunch about that guy Thompson.

NARRATOR:

... the Great McGinty himself, about to go into action! Shall we join McGinty in the patio?

SOUND:

FOOTSTEPS TO THE PATIO, SALOON NOISE DIMINISHES ... FOOTSTEPS ... TWO MEN STRUGGLE, THEN IN BG

McGINTY:

Hey, you! Gimme that gun!

THOMPSON:

No! Don't! Lemme alone!

McGINTY:

Gimme it!

THOMPSON:

I don't wanna live anymore!

McGINTY:

Shut up!

SOUND:

STRUGGLE ENDS ... GUN IS TOSSED AWAY

McGINTY:

Come on out o' here.

THOMPSON:

(GRUNTS) Don't! You - you're breakin' my arm!

McGINTY:

Well, are you comin' peaceful?

THOMPSON:

All right.

SOUND:

FOOTSTEPS INTO SALOON, SALOON NOISE INCREASES

THOMPSON:

Why'd ya have to stop me? Why didn't you let me do it?

McGINTY:

Here. Have a drink.

SOUND:

POURS DRINK, SLIDES GLASS ON COUNTERTOP

THOMPSON:

Thanks.

McGINTY:

Hey, what's the matter with you, kid? What'd ya wanna pull a gun on YERSELF for?

THOMPSON:

I haven't any right to go on living.

McGINTY:

Nuts! What did you do?

THOMPSON:

I was a cashier of a bank up in Montclair, New Jersey.

McGINTY:

So what?

THOMPSON:

I had a nice house, nice wife, nice kids. And I stole twenty-five thousand dollars from the bank. Aw, I don't deserve to live.

McGINTY:

(CRACKS UP LAUGHING) You was the cashier of a bank and you stole ONLY twenty-five thousand bucks? (MORE LAUGHTER) ... Hey! Get a load of this guy! And he wants to shoot himself!

THOMPSON:

Well, what did you ever do, McGinty?

McGINTY:

What did I do? I'll tell ya. I - was the governor - of a state.

THOMPSON:

YOU? Governor of a state? How could you ever have been a governor?

McGINTY:

Well, how do ya get to be anything? Ya gotta start at the bottom and that's where I started. ...

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE FADES OUT

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION

McGINTY:

(NARRATES, TO THOMPSON) I got into town under a freight car. It's snowin' and I'm cold and beat and I ain't been eatin' fer two days and I'm in a soup kitchen, inhalin' some broth, when the politician ups to me ...

SOUND:

NOISE OF BUSY SOUP KITCHEN ... EATIN' AND TALKIN', IN BG

POLITICIAN:

(GRANDLY) Good soup, eh? Certainly kind of the mayor to think of the less fortunate on a night like this.

McGINTY:

Never mind the applesauce, bull.

POLITICIAN:

(QUIETLY) Hey, how'd ya like ta make a couple o' bucks?

McGINTY:

Who d'ya think ya kiddin'? What've I gotta do?

POLITICIAN:

Very simple, my boy. Ya just go down and vote for Mayor Tillinghast and come right back here and collect two bucks!

McGINTY:

How 'bout votin' twice?

POLITICIAN:

That's four bucks.

McGINTY:

What's the jail sentence for repeatin'?

POLITICIAN:

Who said anything about repeatin'? Where do ya think this is? Hicks' Corners? Some people is too lazy to vote, that's all. They don't like this kind o' weather. Some of 'em is sick in bed and can't vote. Maybe a couple of 'em croaked recently. That ain't no reason why Mayor Tillinghast should be cheated out of their support. All we're doin' is gettin' out the vote!

SOUND:

KITCHEN NOISE OUT

MUSIC:

A WRY ACCENT AND A TRANSITION, THEN OUT

SOUND:

NOISY MOB AT CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS, IN BG

VOICE 1:

HEY! Pipe down, you guys! The boss'll be here any second!

SOUND:

MOB PIPES DOWN

VOICE 1:

Now what was you sayin' about that bum?

POLITICIAN:

(ANGRY) I said, THAT BUM just voted thirty-seven times and I need the dough to pay him off!

VOICE 1:

I don't believe a man CAN vote thirty-seven times!

POLITICIAN:

I just said he voted THIRTY-SEVEN TIMES!

VOICE 1:

He couldn't vote THIRTY-SEVEN TIMES!

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS, BOSS' FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

BOSS:

Who voted thirty-seven times?

POLITICIAN:

(SURPRISED TO SEE THE BOSS, MORE POLITE) Oh! Uh, good evenin', boss. Good evenin', Mr. Mayor. (ANGRY AGAIN) That lug there, crammin' in the free lunch!

BOSS:

Pay him off. See, Mayor, the kind of service we're giving you? (TO McGINTY) Hey you, lug!

McGINTY:

(OFF) Heh?

BOSS:

Come in here. We want to look at you.

McGINTY:

(OFF) Me?

BOSS:

Yeah, you.

SOUND:

McGINTY'S FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

BOSS:

Don't you know you ain't supposed to vote more than once?

McGINTY:

Who are you?

BOSS:

Tough guy, huh? I guess you don't know where you are.

McGINTY:

No. And I don't care neither.

BOSS:

This guy kills me. Hah! He thinks he's me!

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

SOUND:

NOISY CROWD AT SALOON, SOMEONE CALLS FOR SCOTCH AND SODA, ETC., IN BG

McGINTY:

(NARRATES, TO THOMPSON) I didn't know it but he was the big political boss of the town. I guess he took a likin' to me because he gave me some dough and I got a shave and a manicure and I bought me a new suit.

SOUND:

SALOON CROWD OUT ... OFFICE DOOR OPENS ... FOOTSTEPS IN ... DOOR SHUTS

LOUIE:

Okay, boss. Here's the lug.

McGINTY:

I, er, got a new suit.

BOSS:

Yeah. Some suit!

McGINTY:

Heh?

BOSS:

Looks more like the suit got you!

McGINTY:

Listen, you--!

BOSS:

Suppose you listen for a change. The reason you're alive and walking around in that horse blanket isn't because I like you, see? It's because I can use some nerve in my business. In the meantime, if you want to do some collecting for me, you've got a job. You get twenty per cent. I pay the hospital bills.

McGINTY:

Gimme the list and shut up.

BOSS:

Now, look! Your job is to collect for the protection I've been giving 'em.

McGINTY:

I'll collect. And when I do I get twenty percent and don't YOU ferget it!

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

SOUND:

BOSS' CAR ENGINE SLOWS TO IDLE ... HORN HONKS

BOSS:

(CALLS TO McGINTY) In here! In here, mug! You can take it easy now. I've been following you. Me and Louie, up there driving.

SOUND:

CAR DOOR OPENS

McGINTY:

Okay. Move over.

SOUND:

CAR DOOR SHUTS ... ENGINE ABRUPTLY OUT

BOSS:

You, uh, collect anything except that black eye?

McGINTY:

Here's your dough.

SOUND:

SHUFFLE OF MUCH PAPER MONEY

McGINTY:

Two fifty and five and four hundred. That's eleven hundred and fifty bucks. Count it.

BOSS:

So you collected after all! I guess you think you're kinda hot stuff, huh, because you beat up a few guys? All right. Keep the change.

McGINTY:

Keep what change? I got twenty percent comin'.

BOSS:

I said keep the whole wad. I never expected to collect it anyhow.

McGINTY:

Huh? Well, then what's the idea of sendin' me out?

BOSS:

I'm glad you didn't disappoint me.

McGINTY:

What?

BOSS:

For a minute, I thought you was gonna say thank you.

McGINTY:

Me?!

BOSS:

You're a card, you are. Yesterday, you were a 'bo on the breadline. Today, you got a thousand berries and a new suit. If you can keep on like you've started today, there's no tellin' where you'll be tomorrow. This is a land of great opportunity.

McGINTY:

Hey, what makes this bus so quiet? You don't hear nuthin' in here.

BOSS:

It's armored. Don't interrupt. (SAVAGE) And if you think I'm not the boss, you try and cross me up some time!

McGINTY:

You got me all a-tremble. I bet you're scared to death o' yourself.

BOSS:

All right! You asked for it!

McGINTY:

Yeah? I'll break your neck, tired as I am.

BOSS:

Ahhhh! Here's where you get yours!

SOUND:

FIST FIGHT ... CONTINUES IN BG

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

SOUND:

FIGHTING OUT ... NOISY SALOON CROWD, IN BG

McGINTY:

(TO THOMPSON) Yeah. He always was a little muscle-bound. I could beat him to the punch, ya know? Ha! Boy, but we had some Brannigans.

THOMPSON:

(SKEPTICAL) I thought you said you were the governor of a state. Sounds like you were just a cheap crook.

McGINTY:

(TO THOMPSON) Well, ya gotta' crawl before ya walk, don't ya? I collected the chicken feed for a while, see, and then the guy makes me a alderman and I move in on the second floor.

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE OUT

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

SOUND:

PHONE HOOK JIGGLES

BOSS:

Hello?! Hello?! ... I thought we was cut off. As I was saying, Tillinghast is dead as a door nail. We need a new face. Clean. Typical American. Upright. Dependable. Somebody they don't know too much about. What do you think of McGinty? ... Eh? Never heard of him, huh? Well! That's just what I'm talking about!

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

MAXWELL:

A hundred thousand dollars?!

McGINTY:

(PLEASANT) That's what they tell me.

MAXWELL:

But that's a confounded outrage, Mr. Alderman! Even in the days of Boss Herman we didn't have to pay THAT much for franchises. Not even in the days of Bath House Jake! Those boys were pikers compared to this mob!

McGINTY:

Oh you don't mean that, Mr. Maxwell. You got to remember everything's gone up. Living expenses is higher ... there's an income tax ...

MAXWELL:

(GROWLS IN DISGUST)

McGINTY:

Well, you're dealing with a better class o' men than Bath House Jake.

MAXWELL:

Now, look here! I will not pay graft! Millions for defense but not one cent for tribute!

McGINTY:

You could call it "advertising."

MAXWELL:

(SCOFFS)

SOUND:

PHONE RINGS, McGINTY PICKS UP

McGINTY:

Yes?

BOSS:

(ON PHONE) Come over here. I want to talk to you. I got something important.

McGINTY:

Be right over.

SOUND:

McGINTY HANGS UP PHONE, RISES

McGINTY:

Well, I'm sorry, Maxwell, but that's the way it is.

SOUND:

McGINTY OPENS OFFICE DOOR

McGINTY:

Uh, Catherine?

CATHERINE:

Yes, Mr. McGinty?

McGINTY:

I've got to go over and see the boss. I'll be back about four.

CATHERINE:

All right, Mr. McGinty.

SOUND:

McGINTY'S FOOTSTEPS AWAY

MAXWELL:

Now just a minute, McGinty!

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION AND OUT

BOSS:

So you got here, huh?

McGINTY:

Yeah.

BOSS:

Sit down. Have a cigar.

McGINTY:

Are you kiddin'? I know them cigars.

BOSS:

Listen. You want to be reform mayor?

McGINTY:

Reform mayor?

BOSS:

That's what I said.

McGINTY:

Well, what da ya mean "reform mayor"?

BOSS:

What do you think it means?! Don't make me say everything twice, will you?

McGINTY:

Well--

BOSS:

I said, do you want to be reform mayor of this city? Mayor!

McGINTY:

Well, what YOU got to do with the reform party?

BOSS:

I am the reform party! Who do you think?

McGINTY:

You're the reform party?

BOSS:

Why do you make me say everything twice?

McGINTY:

But since when?

BOSS:

Since a long time ago. In this town, I'm all the parties! You think I'm gonna starve every time they change administrations?

McGINTY:

But then, where does the reform party come in?

BOSS:

They come in the back door every Wednesday. I ask you if you want to be reform mayor. You give me a plain answer.

McGINTY:

Well, sure, I - guess so.

BOSS:

Good. You're in. You'll have to kiss a lot of babies. Meet a lot of guys. And, uh, wear your old clothes. They don't want no dudes after that last one. And, oh, you'll have to get married right away.

McGINTY:

What do you mean, "get married right away"?

BOSS:

(EXPLODES) What do you think it means?! Do I have to say everything twice?! (CALMER) Women vote. Maybe they don't know it. They don't like bachelors.

McGINTY:

Oh, they don't, huh? Well, if they don't like 'em, they can lump 'em.

BOSS:

What's the matter with you? Are you nuts?

McGINTY:

No. I'm just playin' hard to git.

BOSS:

(SWEETLY) Daniel--

McGINTY:

What?

BOSS:

Don't you know what marriage is? Don't you know that marriage has always been the most beautiful ... the most beautiful set-up between the sexes? Don't you know that a man without a wife is like a-- Like a coat without the pants? Like a - pig without a poke. Marriage is the most - er, the most--

McGINTY:

Then why don't you try it?

BOSS:

(EXPLODES) Because I ain't runnin' for mayor!

McGINTY:

Yeah? Well, I ain't neither! Poke that in your pig!

MUSIC:

TO A CONCLUSION AND OUT

SOUND:

STUDIO AUDIENCE APPLAUSE

ANNOUNCER:

Before continuing with Part Two of "Academy Award," may we suggest, for your enjoyment every day, an ever-popular member of the great family of Squibb products -- pure, refreshing Squibb Dental Cream! There's something about its delightful minty flavor that seems to wake up your mouth, to leave it pleasantly cool, clean, refreshed. Look into your mirror and you will see your own smile with all its natural sparkle revealed. For the active ingredient in pure Squibb Dental Cream is one of the safest, softest, yet most effective polishing agents known to dental science. It's just one more reason why you can taste, feel, and see the refreshing difference when you brush your
teeth with Squibb Dental Cream. Use it regularly for a more attractive smile. A cleaner, happier mouth. Taste -- feel -- and see -- the refreshing difference!

In just a moment, Brian Donlevy will be back with the second part of "The Great McGinty." But, first, we want to thank Paramount Pictures for making this story available. You'll be interested to know that you can soon see Brian Donlevy in Paramount's new Technicolor production, "The Virginian."

MUSIC:

THEME ... THEN IN BG

ANNOUNCER:

And now, Part Two of the Academy Award-winning picture, "The Great McGinty"!

MUSIC:

A BRIEF INTRO, THEN OUT

SOUND:

NOISY SALOON CROWD, IN BG

McGINTY:

(TO THOMPSON) do you want another shot of this?

THOMPSON:

Yeah.

SOUND:

DRINK IS POURED

THOMPSON:

Well, did ya get married?

McGINTY:

(TO THOMPSON) Yeah. Yeah, I made the mistake of talkin' it over with my secretary first and then I was a goner.

SOUND:

SALOON CROWD OUT

CATHERINE:

Oh, I'm so happy for you, Mr. McGinty.

McGINTY:

What are ya talkin' about? I told him to go fly a kite! Can you see me tellin' some dame where I've been till two o'clock in the mornin' and - and how did you get that lip rouge on your hat?!

CATHERINE:

(AMUSED) Ha! Well, I certainly feel the same way you do about it, Mr. McGinty ...

McGINTY:

(GRUNTS HIS APPROVAL)

CATHERINE:

... but you need the woman's vote -- and if you had a wife-- Uh, what I mean to say, Mr. McGinty, is that - I've been married before and, well, I'd be willing to marry you ... McGinty.

McGINTY:

(STUNNED) Huh?

SOUND:

PHONE RINGS, CATHERINE PICKS UP

CATHERINE:

Hello, Mr. McGinty's office. Who's calling? ... Oh, it's for you Mr. McGinty.

McGINTY:

Yeah. Oh, what the--? Tell 'em I'm dead or somethin'. I - I, er, got to go into the office and think this over careful.

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION THAT INCLUDES THE WEDDING MARCH ... THEN OUT

CATHERINE:

(UNCERTAIN) I suppose we're legally married. Aren't we? Really married?

McGINTY:

(MATTER OF FACT) That's what the guy said.

CATHERINE:

Mr. McGinty, I don't want you to think I've been concealing anything from you.

McGINTY:

Huh?

CATHERINE:

There's no reason why I should. It's just that in the excitement--

McGINTY:

What?

CATHERINE:

Sit down, Mr. McGinty.

McGINTY:

What's on your mind?

CATHERINE:

It's just that, well, I think you ought to know, if we're all going to have to live in the same house--

McGINTY:

Uhh ... who's "all"?

CATHERINE:

I've been meaning to tell you that-- Well, I have two of the loveliest little children and they have the cutest little dog. That's what I knew you wouldn't mind, being mayor and everything, and - I don't suppose you'll be home very much anyway.

MUSIC:

FOR A SOULFUL TRANSITION THAT TURNS INTO A ROUSING "STARS AND STRIPES FOREVER"

SOUND:

CROWD NOISE OVER THE ROUSING PORTION OF THE MUSIC

VOICE 2:

(FROM CROWD) We want McGinty!

CROWD:

(CHEERS AND HOLLERS IN CELEBRATION)

SOUND:

TRANSITIONS TO SALOON NOISE

McGINTY:

(THOUGHTFUL, TO THOMPSON) Well, they got me all right. Bein' married, it was a cinch to get elected. And Catherine wasn't a bad wife at all for any guy's dough, even though we didn't work at it for awhile but - bein' mayor WAS a cinch. So when I got to thinkin' of being married - that was a lot tougher.

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE OUT ... KNOCK AT BEDROOM DOOR

CATHERINE:

Come in.

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS

CATHERINE:

Oh, Bessie, put it on the bed, Bessie. Did you wash out those other stockings?

McGINTY:

Not yet.

CATHERINE:

(STARTLED) Oh! Oh, Mr. McGinty. What are you doing in my room?

McGINTY:

(HESITANT) Well, you know, Catherine, I, er - I was thinkin'. Why - why don't you -- we -- have dinner together some time?

CATHERINE:

Why, I'd be very glad to, Mr. McGinty. Anytime.

McGINTY:

(CHUCKLES, RELIEVED) Ya know, if you told anybody that we'd been livin' here like this fer six months and neither one of us ever give the other one a thought ... eh ... they wouldn't believe it.

CATHERINE:

That's right. Even if it was true, they wouldn't believe it.

McGINTY:

(CHUCKLES) Well, it - it's silly.

CATHERINE:

Yes. It is.

McGINTY:

I ain't never even kissed ya.

CATHERINE:

No, Mr. McGinty.

McGINTY:

That's silly. Isn't it?

CATHERINE:

Yes ... Mr. McGinty.

McGINTY:

Well... What's the use of bein' silly? I'm your husband, ain't I? ... Catherine?

CATHERINE:

(SIGHS HAPPILY, MELTS IN HIS ARMS, WHISPERS) Ohhh ... Mr. McGinty!

MUSIC:

FOR A GENTLE TRANSITION ... THEN IN BG

McGINTY:

(READS, A LITTLE POORLY, FROM CHILDREN'S BOOK) "... But they had to get up pretty early to be smarter than Peter Rabbit because he was as full of brains as a dog is full of fleas. Our old friend didn't even stop to think. He took a hop, skip and a jump and started to cross the clover field as fast as his little fat legs would carry him. Just as he got to the edge of the field by the old split rail fence, a shadow fell across his path. And who do you suppose it was? I'll give you three guesses and three more and three more. But you will never guess who it really was because it was none other than our old friend--"

MUSIC:

OUT

CATHERINE:

Darling.

McGINTY:

Huh?

CATHERINE:

The children are asleep now.

McGINTY:

Oh, how d'ya like that? Hey, just a minute till I finish this thing.

MUSIC:

GENTLY, IN BG

McGINTY:

(READS) "It was none other than our friend Muggledy-Wump the Tortoise." [pronounced "tor-toys"]

MUSIC:

OUT

McGINTY:

Huh. Well, what d'ya know? That's who I thought it was all the time.

CATHERINE:

Darling, the children love you so and admire you. Hurts sometimes. They think you're George Washington and Abraham Lincoln rolled together -- only finer.

McGINTY:

Hey, have you been drinkin' catnip?

CATHERINE:

No, darling. No, I haven't. I know you and I believe in you. You'll be strong enough some day, Dan. And then you'll wash clean of graft and crooks and thieving politicians and REALLY deserve your title -- "The Honorable."

MUSIC:

FOR A STIRRING TRANSITION THAT TURNS INTO A ROUSING VERSION OF "THERE'LL BE A HOT TIME IN THE OLD TOWN TONIGHT" ... IN BG

SOUND:

CROWD NOISE OVER THE ROUSING PORTION OF THE MUSIC

CROWD:

(CHEERS AND HOLLERS IN CELEBRATION)

POLITICIAN:

McGinty for governor!

CROWD:

(CHEERS IN RESPONSE)

POLITICIAN:

And you don't be makin' no mistakes, frieeeeeends! And I'll tell ya somethin' else!

VOICE 3:

(FROM CROWD) Tell us, tell us!

POLITICIAN:

In this year alone, he put forty thousand men to work! Forty thousand lunch pails, my frieeeennnds! Forty thousand happy families! Money! In circulation! Prosperity! And that man -- is Daniel McGinty!

CROWD:

(CHEERS IN RESPONSE)

VOICE 4:

Hey! Folks! It's over! And McGinty -- by thirty thousand!!

CROWD:

(CHEERS IN RESPONSE, THEN OUT)

MUSIC:

FOR A TRIUMPHANT TRANSITION, THEN OUT

CATHERINE:

Oh, I'm so proud of you, Dan. You're strong enough for anything now.

McGINTY:

Heh?

CATHERINE:

You're governor. Governor of the state. Now you can keep your promise.

McGINTY:

Look, I - I'm governor. You're the governor's lady now. Everybody don't get to be governor. Isn't that enough for ya? Why don't we leave well enough alone?

CATHERINE:

Dan ...

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS

VOICE 5:

Oh, Mr. Governor?

McGINTY:

Eh?

VOICE 5:

The reception committee is waiting to see you, sir.

McGINTY:

Aw, well, show 'em in. Honey, you go with that guy. Find another room for a while. I'll be with you when I get rid of these bums.

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS ... FOOTSTEPS ... DOOR SHUTS

BOSS:

(HAPPY) Well, well, well! We did it, eh, McGinty?

McGINTY:

What are you doin' in here? I'm expectin' the reception committee.

BOSS:

He's expectin' the committee. Listen, punk, you got it. I'm the committee! What a wonderful opportunity, Daniel. The state needs everything. They've had honest governors so long the whole place is in wrack and ruin.

McGINTY:

Is that so?

BOSS:

Fantastic! The roads, for instance. They're in terrible condition. In case of war, we'd be at their mercy.

McGINTY:

How could an enemy ever get to here?

BOSS:

How do I know? Am I a general?! Now, we'll start off with a new state capital building. Maybe white marble. Or do you like pink?

McGINTY:

What do we need it for?

BOSS:

Need it for?

SOUND:

BANG-BANG-BANGS ON WALL

BOSS:

This one's got a crack in it!

McGINTY:

I like it. And I got to live in it.

BOSS:

What are you tryin' to pull, lug?

McGINTY:

Look, there ain't gonna be no dams and no bridges and no buildings that people don't need. From now on.

BOSS:

The people? Hah! Are you sick or something?

McGINTY:

I feel fine.

BOSS:

Then what are you trying to put over, you cheap double-crossing rat? After I spent four hundred grand to put you in here.

McGINTY:

Look. Here's the key to my safety deposit box. I'll pay ya the rest out o' my salary.

BOSS:

What's all this talk? You're spouting like a woman. Aha! Your wife! That cheesecake you married.

McGINTY:

Leave her out o' this!

SOUND:

McGINTY PUNCHES THE BOSS WHO FALLS TO FLOOR

BOSS:

(GRUNTS IN PAIN)

McGINTY:

There, I told ya.

BOSS:

You skunk. You double-crossing skunk. I'll give it to you for this.

McGINTY:

Oh, no you don't. I'll bust your skull.

SOUND:

McGINTY HITS BOSS WITH A WOODEN CHAIR

BOSS:

Ahhh, hit me with a chair will you?

SOUND:

SCUFFLE ... YELLING ... CHAOS ... FURNITURE THROWN ... DOOR OPENS

VOICE 6:

Mr. Governor?! Mr. Governor, where are you?!

VOICE 7:

Oh, there he is, under the table on top of the big guy!

SOUND:

TABLE OVERTURNED WITH A CRASH

McGINTY:

WAS on top!

MUSIC:

FOR A TRANSITION, THEN IN BG

PAPER BOY:

EXTRY! EXTRY! READ ALL ABOUT IT! STATE HOUSE SCANDAL! STATE HOUSE SCANDAL! EXTRY! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

MUSIC:

FINISHES TRANSITION, THEN OUT

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS, FOOTSTEPS IN

DEPUTY:

Governor? Governor McGinty?

McGINTY:

Yeah?

DEPUTY:

I'm afraid I've got bad news for you, Governor. You're under arrest.

MUSIC:

FOR A BRIEF TRANSITION, THEN OUT

GUARD:

Put him in cell number six, right next to the other one.

SOUND:

CELL DOOR SLAMS SHUT

MUSIC:

FOR A BRIEF TRANSITION, THEN OUT

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE, IN BG

McGINTY:

(NARRATES, TO THOMPSON) Oh, boy, that turned out to be somethin'. I said he tried to kill me. He said I tried to kill him. He said I was a crook. I said he was. And, well, anyway -- heh heh -- there we were, sittin' on the hot seat in the cooler, side by side.

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE OUT

CATHERINE:

Oh, Dan, I'll stand by you. I'll fight for you night and day. We'll lick them if it takes twenty years!

McGINTY:

Sure. Sure. Thanks for tryin', honey.

CATHERINE:

Well, good night, Dan.

McGINTY:

Good night, honey. And don't you worry about me.

MUSIC:

FOR A BRIEF TRANSITION, THEN OUT

SOUND:

CELL DOOR SHUTS

BOSS:

Well, you're still here.

McGINTY:

Who asked you anything?

BOSS:

I hope you're satisfied, you rat! The first time I catch you alone, I'll bat your brains all over the yard!

McGINTY:

You and your little brother!

PRISONER:

Hey! How about a little quiet down there? Why don't ya shut up?!

BOSS:

Shut up your own trap!

McGINTY:

Stick a cork in it!

BOSS:

Yeah!

McGINTY:

Cheese it ... the guard's comin'.

POLITICIAN:

Here, here - quiet in there! Who do you think you are, you guys?!

McGINTY:

Holy smoke, it's the politician. How did he get in that suit?

POLITICIAN:

Shut up!

BOSS:

What's the big idea?

POLITICIAN:

Any more noise and I'll put ya both in solitary! (HINTS BROADLY) I got all the keys right here - and it'll be very simple.

BOSS:

You've got the keys?

POLITICIAN:

You said it. Now, be quiet! Wait till it gets dark, if ya wanna' yell!

MUSIC:

FOR A BRIEF TRANSITION, THEN OUT

BOSS:

Come on. Come on, Lug. You want we should get caught now after the politician sprung us? And got us this car and an hour start?

McGINTY:

I'll be right with ya, Horseface, just let me finish this phone call. (INTO PHONE) Catherine, I - I can't talk much. I got two mugs waitin' for me. I - I couldn't stay in the jug. It wouldn't look right for you to have to tell the kids. I - I think you're wonderful, honey, and I wanted to tell ya I left ya a key to the deposit box. There's somethin' there I held out on ya. So long, honey.

BOSS:

Come on! We got a boat to catch!

McGINTY:

(INTO PHONE) I gotta hang up, darlin'. I - I'm sorry it didn't work out but you can't make a silk purse out of a pig's ear ... Uh, kiss the kids for me, will ya?

SOUND:

SIRENS BEGIN TO WAIL IN DISTANCE

BOSS:

Come on, I said!

SOUND:

CAR DOOR SLAMS ... CAR DRIVES OFF

MUSIC:

FOR A BRIEF TRANSITION, THEN OUT

SOUND:

SALOON NOISE, IN BG

THOMPSON:

(DRUNK, TO McGINTY) So why didn't he kill ya?

McGINTY:

I never could figure that out.

THOMPSON:

Yeah? Maybe it's because you're a big liar and what ya told me never happened at all.

McGINTY:

(CHUCKLES) Aw, well, have it your own way, kid. And that'll be two bucks for the drinks.

SOUND:

COINS ON COUNTERTOP

McGINTY:

Thanks!

SOUND:

CASH REGISTER RINGS

BOSS:

(APPROACHES) I saw you ... you lug!

McGINTY:

Saw me what, Pig Face?

BOSS:

Don't make me say everything twice! I saw you put those two bucks in your pocket and ring up no sale! I'm going to teach you, once and for all, to be honest!

McGINTY:

Yeah? Get your ham hand off my bar!

BOSS:

You asked for it! Come on!

SOUND:

McGINTY AND THE BOSS FIGHT, THROW CHAIRS, ET CETERA ... CONTINUES IN BG

McGINTY:

So did you -- and here's where you get it!

LOUIE:

(AFTER A PAUSE) Hey, it's so quiet in here. Nothin' but that music. What's goin' on at the bar?

POLITICIAN:

Ah, nothin' much, Louie. McGinty and the Boss are at it again.

LOUIE:

(LAUGHS) Boys will be boys! Ah, I got four aces. What do you got, politician?

POLITICIAN:

Not bad. I got five kings. Sorry, Louie.

SOUND:

FIGHT CONTINUES IN BG ... QUICKLY DROWNED OUT BY--

MUSIC:

FOR A FINISH ... THEN OUT

SOUND:

(STUDIO AUDIENCE APPLAUSE)

ANNOUNCER:

If you will look at any Squibb product, you will see that every package bears a control number. That number is the symbol of a painstaking way of working that safeguards every step in the production of every Squibb product. Every date, every test that is made -- from the day raw materials arrive at Squibb to the day the finished product is in your hands -- is recorded by the Squibb control number. It identifies every laboratory worker and every scientist involved in the making of a Squibb product. It helps to eliminate the risk of human error in all Squibb products, from lifesaving drugs to pure Squibb Dental Cream. For no Squibb product is released until every detail of its history has been entered in its control records. It's just one more evidence of the quest for perfection, that never ceases in the House of Squibb. One more reason why Squibb is a name you can trust!

MUSIC:

THEME ... IN AND UNDER

ANNOUNCER:

Next week, another great picture! The House of Squibb will present "Academy Award" with a treat for the entire family! A special treat for the children! Walt Disney's delightful fantasy, "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves"!

MUSIC:

THEME ... CONTINUES

ANNOUNCER:

Paramount's "The Great McGinty" was written for radio by Frank Wilson, with an original musical score composed and conducted by Leith Stevens. Our producer-director is Dee Engelbach. Paramount's current release is "Kitty," starring Paulette Goddard and Ray Milland. This is Hugh Brundage bidding you good night until next week at this same time when you are invited to listen again to "Academy Award" - presented by the House of Squibb, a name you can trust!

SOUND:

(STUDIO AUDIENCE APPLAUSE)

MUSIC:

TO A FINISH ... THEN OUT

ANNOUNCER:

This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System!